Friend Swamped by the Struggles of Others
Dear Abby | March 12th, 2026 | Letter 2 of 2
DEAR ABBY: Some of my very good friends are married to less-than-stellar partners. There are money issues, infidelity, abuse and everything in between. I hear about their issues constantly, and I don't know how to respond anymore. It's difficult seeing close friends struggle when there's not much I can do to help. I know these friends are not asking for help -- just venting -- but thanks to phones and texting, I get updated on their drama every day. I have muted their texts and respond less often. Despite all of this, I still find it very difficult knowing the struggle they are experiencing. It makes my chest hurt and my heart heavy. How do I navigate this and protect my sanity? -- LISTENER IN TEXAS.
DEAR LISTENER: Navigate this and protect your sanity by being honest with these friends. Tell them you care very much that they are having marital troubles, but you are not qualified to help solve their issues. (It's the truth.) Then advise them to consult a marriage counselor, psychologist or an organization that supports victims to help them break the cycle. If you do, it may lessen your stress level as well as theirs.
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