Aging Mother Refuses To Acknowledge Risk of Falling
Dear Abby | March 9th, 2026 | Letter 1 of 2
DEAR ABBY: I moved across the country nine years ago to be closer to my parents as they age. They are now in their early to mid-80s. My mother has recently had a few falls. One was bad enough that she had to be taken by ambulance to the ER because she was not able to stand. (I suspect some of her falling is due to having a drink or two at a casino, which affects her balance.) I have been saying for almost a year that my mother needs a walker. Because it has fallen on deaf ears, I took it upon myself to buy her a walker and shower chair. She and Dad are still convinced she doesn't need a walker. Abby, when we got to the hospital, she needed assistance to use the bathroom because she couldn't stand or walk on her own after the fall. Today I learned she and Dad went to a casino without the walker. I am beside myself! They are either in denial or just don't want to listen to me, but I am at my wits' end because I'm sure this will happen again. I'm afraid her next fall may result in broken bones or worse. Any advice? -- FEARFUL DAUGHTER IN LAS VEGAS.
DEAR DAUGHTER: You may be trying to reason with the wrong parent. Assuming they are both in their right minds, tell your father that with the history of falls your mother has, the result of the next one could be serious. Neither of them is a spring chicken. If either one, particularly your mother, were to break a hip and be bedridden, it could lead to pneumonia and death. If they make light of it, get their doctor to weigh in.
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