New Romance Has Familiar Red Flags
Dear Abby | March 8th, 2026 | Letter 2 of 2
DEAR ABBY: A year ago, I got out of a verbally abusive relationship. Five months later, I met the man of my dreams, who had also been in a very bad marriage. We are really good together, but if something bad happens, he flies off the handle and accuses me of being stupid and not normal. He also threatens to leave me if I don't change my behavior. This was the same threat I got from my ex. I suspect that when I get upset about a problem, he thinks I'm his ex-wife. What should I do? I love him, but I don't want to be back in the same kind of relationship as before. -- SCARED AND CONFUSED IN MICHIGAN.
DEAR SCARED: You may not want to be back in the same kind of relationship that you had before, but it looks like that's almost exactly where you are. I don't blame you for being scared and confused because there is something wrong with your manpicker. You have now been with two emotional abusers. Before involving yourself in any more romantic relationships, it's important that you discuss this with a psychologist or other licensed mental health professional who can help you break this pattern. If you do, you'll spare yourself years of bad choices and heartache.
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