Dad's New Girlfriend Rolls Up the Welcome Mat
Dear Abby | August 14th, 2025 | Letter 1 of 2
DEAR ABBY: My parents divorced when I was in high school, and Dad kept the house I grew up in. I'm in college across town and have my own place, but I still visited Dad often. As a teenager, it used to be my job to cook the family dinner two nights a week. I loved it and continued to cook when I was visiting. Dad now has a serious girlfriend who has moved in with him. She's uncomfortable with a guest being in her kitchen and says it's appropriate for me to only be in the living room when I visit. If I want a glass of water, I'm supposed to ask her for it. She calls it being a good host, but it feels like a power move to push me out. Dad says it's her house and her rules. I'm sad that what was my home for 18 years is now off-limits. I get that she's insecure about the relationship and wants to put some distance between me and my dad, but I no longer feel welcome in the house I grew up in because she's so rigid. I have invited them (both) to my place, but they haven't accepted. What do I do now? -- PUSHED OUT IN ARKANSAS.
DEAR PUSHED: Your father's girlfriend appears to be both controlling and insecure, and your father has made clear that he doesn't want to rock the boat. Under the circumstances, you have no choice but to follow the new house rules. If you can abide by them, visit your dad. If you can't reconcile yourself, then you may have to wait for him to miss your presence in his life before he will consent to be a guest at your place. (What a sad state of affairs. I'm sorry.)
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