Single Mom Feels Like She Doesn't Know Teen Son
Dear Abby | July 21st, 2025 | Letter 2 of 2
DEAR ABBY: I'm the mother of two teenage sons. My younger son Richie, is 17 and a great kid. He has a 3.8 grade-point average in high school, studies hard and is never out roaming. He has scholarships waiting for the taking. When I come home late at night, he's already asleep. What bothers me is that I know nothing about his life. Richie mentioned that he's going to his junior prom, and I have no idea who the girl is he is taking. I don't know his friends, although I do know many of the moms of the friends he's acquainted with. As a single parent, I work several jobs. I'm exhausted and basically have no life. I don't want my son to feel I would judge him if he gave me more information about what he does with the little free time he has, but I feel left out. I remember when I was 17 and didn't want my parents to know my business, so I'm reluctant to ask him a bunch of questions. I have never searched his room because I respect his privacy. I always promised my kids that they would have their privacy and freedom as long as their grades were great, and they have given me no reason to question their lifestyles. What should I do? -- LEFT-OUT MOM.
DEAR MOM: You and your son are living on different schedules. From what you have written, I don't have the impression that he is being secretive. Find a time when you are both awake and start having some short conversations with him, so it won't seem like he is being grilled. Because of your work schedule, you have become like ships passing in the night, but there is still time to change course.
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